That Star Trek Horror Show

Remember that time Captain Kirk appeared on a horror show in the '70s? No? Neither do I, because it only exists in my mind.

Sometimes I have dreams about concepts or stories that, upon waking, I can use in comics or series I'm working on. Last night's dream was a doozy. Since it involves Star Trek, I won't be using it in any of my books, but here are the key points I can still remember:

• It's 1973, and Star Trek is getting a second look. The powers that be decide to tease viewers with new Trek content. Unfortunately, the sets have been destroyed, and no one wants to spend much money on what will essentially be a cameo. Also, no one wants to include Star Trek in their show. There are no real sci-fi shows. The one that ultimately does it is a British horror anthology series called "The Horror Show."

• In this episode, guest stars include Vincent Price and, yes, Captain Kirk himself, William Shatner. If that's not weird enough, hold on tight.

• They decide not to build any Enterprise sets. Even the ship itself won't appear. In fact, the only Star Trek props are Kirk's uniform and a phaser. There's also a shuttlecraft, but not the Galileo-type from the series—this one looks like a modern airplane, almost like the Phase II concept from Matt Jefferies. We only see it crashed, not in flight.

• For some reason, they never get Captain Kirk's hair right. It just appears combed over to one side.

  

• The story is strange, too. Captain Kirk has crashed on a planet on his way back to the Enterprise. He's being stalked by a warlock played by Vincent Price. I don't remember much more. While the warlock looked more like a vampire, he had some connection to Frankenstein. How? I don't know. In the end, Kirk destroys the warlock's computers and escapes. The last we see is Kirk, amidst spooky fog and smoke, telling the Enterprise to beam him up. Roll credits.

• The sets of Price's lab and castle look worse than anything on the original Trek. The feel of the show is very much like "Legends of the Superheroes" that brought Adam West and Burt Ward back a decade after their show ended in a godawful special. Kirk's appearance in "The Horror Show" is pretty much that—only worse.

  
  
  
  

  

  
  

• There's no Spock. No McCoy. No Enterprise. Not even a starship or starfield.

• So, what do you think? Would this be a time capsule treat today? Would it have reignited new Star Trek if it were real? Since I'm the only one who has "seen" it, I'm going to say "no." Would a tour de force acting showdown and fisticuffs between Shatner and Price be a sight to see? Absolutely!